08.14 美帝鍵盤俠：沒想到你是這樣的庫裡和詹姆斯

勇士球星伊戈達拉本週參加了TNT對於PGA高爾夫賽事的轉播，在比賽轉播中，一哥表示：“庫裡一直以來差不多就是球隊的總經理，所以我想在我的合同到期的時候是站在他這一邊的。”

此話一出，休賽期時閒得蛋疼的Reddit外國球迷們展開了熱烈討論，他們幻想，其實一臉人畜無害的庫裡才是勇士隊真正的幕後操控者？一起來看看他們都是怎麼胡說八道的！（簡直是活脫脫的電視劇劇本，內容有刪減，純娛樂調侃，均無惡意）

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[–]WarriorsThe_Great_Saiyaman21 1442 points 14 hours ago

Imagine if Steph was actually what we thought Lebron was all along.

你們想象一下，其實庫裡背地裡才是我們一直以為的“勒經理”...

[–]Knicksanditcounts 28 points 9 hours ago

You know how in the All-Star Game it was Team LeBron vs. Team Steph and they chose all the players? Apparently, that was just the NBA formalizing the process.

你們知道為什麼全明星賽是勒布朗隊vs庫裡隊以及為什麼是他們倆來選人嗎？那就是聯盟在為他們的“總經理”身份做

合法化的過程！

[–]NuggetsSozeKayze 21 points 10 hours ago

The greatest trick Steph has ever pulled was convincing the world his GM exists

史蒂芬變過的最了不起的魔法就是欺騙我們他的總經理是存在的。

[–]NBAMygaffer 17 points 13 hours ago

People joke about "LeGM" but most franchises consult their best players about roster decisions.

人們總是拿“勒經理”來開玩笑，但球隊在做陣容調整的時候都會去徵求隊內最好球員的意見的。

[–]Bullsroshambo11 351 points 16 hours ago

If only J.R. Smith had done this with LeBron...

要是JR也這麼對待勒布朗...

[–]sop1232 61 points 15 hours ago

He did, that’s why Cavs didn’t bring Bron back

JR真幹了！這就是勒布朗沒能回到騎士的原因！

[–][CLE] LeBron JamesSomali_Kamikaze 584 points 16 hours ago

Smh. What is it with these Akron-born athletes and their pathological need to control everything?

唉，為什麼這些來自阿克倫的孩子都想要控制所有事情？？？

[–]LakersNBAGuyUK 94 points 14 hours ago

TIL Steph Curry is literally from Akron, Ohio, despite having caused the Cavs several years of hurt.

今天我才知道庫裡是出生在俄亥俄的阿克倫，但他傷害了騎士好多年...

[–]adamhutch 96 points 14 hours ago

He was born in the same hospital as LeBron

[–][SAS] Danny Greendiffeqmaster 102 points 13 hours ago

On the same day and at the same time and they made eye contact in the hallway for one brief moment as nurses pushed them in opposite directions.

在那一天，當護士們將他們倆乘坐的嬰兒車往相反方向推去的時候，史蒂芬和勒布朗在通道內用眼神交流了一秒。

[–]Celticsjaylen_browns_beard 92 points 13 hours ago

That nurse’s name? Nick Nurse.

而那個護士的名字，正是尼克-納斯（猛龍隊主帥）

[–]ThunderMunstrom 21 points 13 hours ago

3 births that day, LeBron Steph and the rivalry.

那一天誕生了勒布朗、庫裡、以及他們兩人的宿命對決。

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[–]WarriorsMacDerfus 90 points 11 hours ago

Does that mean he signed himself on a bargain deal several years ago?

那這是不是意味著庫裡在前幾年給自己簽了一份廉價合同？

[–]ssaltmine 50 points 11 hours ago

I mean... that would be genius! That's the perfect strategy to keep the core of Klay, Draymond, and Iguodala together.

我說那也太天才了吧！那是一個留住克萊、追夢和一哥的完美策略！

[–]SpursMundaneNecessary1 31 points 10 hours ago*

At the time that $40m/4 extension was signed (Nov 2012), the Warriors' (perceived) best players were David Lee and Andrew Bogut.

Steph was already godly efficient but his own fans preferred Monta Ellis over him for some reason. He and Klay both broke out after the 2013 all-star break. Draymond was a rookie shooting 30/20/80. I don't think anybody expected the three of them to turn into the best trio in the league two years later.

在他簽下那份4年4千萬（2012年11月）合同的時候，勇士隊最好的球員還是大衛李和博古特。

史蒂芬那時候已經很有效率了但他的球迷更喜歡蒙塔艾利斯。他和克萊都在2013年的全明星週末之後開始爆發。追夢當時還是個命中率30-20-80的菜鳥。那時候誰能想到他們仨能在兩年後成為聯盟最好的三人組？

[–]ssaltmine 21 points 10 hours ago

That just shows how Steph was a master puppeteer! He pulled the strings at the right moment to get Lee traded, and get the best out of Bogut to win a championship, and secure Klay, and then Draymond.

這也正好展現了庫裡是個操縱者！他在正確時間交易了李哥，然後在總冠軍之旅中抽出了博古特的最佳表現，然後留下了克萊、之後留下了追夢。

[–]PropheticBets 2 points 7 hours ago

I don't think he is invisible GM. He could not secure 'No Trade' clause when he resigned.

我還是不認為他是一個隱形總經理，他都沒辦法為自己搞到一個交易否決權。

[–]Sideway2 4 points 2 hours ago

You don’t need a ‘no trade’ when you’re the GM.

當你是總經理的時候，你要個錘子交易否決權。

[–]Knicksemoti0n 560 points 16 hours ago

he just saying he got the mf power in the organization

if he doesn't fuck with kd, kd gone

if he doesn't fuck with the owner, owner gone

if he doesn't fuck with booger, booger gone

一哥就是說庫裡在球隊的權力很大而已

如果他看KD不爽，那KD就要走人

如果他看老闆不爽，那老闆也要走人

如果他看錶妹不爽，那表妹也要走人

[–]HornetsYizWasHere 250 points 16 hours ago

Imagine if he said he doesn't fuck with Klay anymore and they just traded him immediately.

想象一下，如果他說他看克萊不順眼，然後勇士立馬交易了克萊...

[–]Sunsjnicholass 213 points 16 hours ago

I imagine even more people would love Klay if he weren't on the dubs.

那離開了勇士的克萊可能會被更多人喜歡！

[–]Raptors1sp 39 points 8 hours ago

CURRY shimmies into The Office of Bob Myers

CURRY: I want Harrison Barnes GONE!

MYERS: Bu-but he was good for us all year!

CURRY: GONE!

MYERS: 73 games!

CURRY: I want Bogart gone, the Brazilians, Speights whale looking ass, not to mention Ezeli, but first of all BARNES!

Bob Myers: But Wardell ... who will replace them?

STEPHEN CURRY smiles

庫裡抖著肩走進了鮑勃-邁爾斯的辦公室

庫裡：我要讓哈里森-巴恩斯滾蛋！

邁爾斯：但、但他去年打得很好啊...

庫裡：讓他走人！

邁爾斯：我們贏了73場球誒...

庫裡：我還想讓博古特滾蛋、還有那個巴西人、還有斯貝茨，更不要說那個艾澤利了，但是，最先讓巴恩斯滾蛋！

邁爾斯：但是，瓦德爾（庫裡的名字），你想要誰來取代他們呢？

庫裡露出了神秘的微笑......

圖片內容來源網絡：Reddit

整理：直播8 泰拳警告

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