“幫我翻譯個東西吧”——“給錢嗎兄dei？”
“bāng wǒ fān yì gè dōng xī ba ”——“gěi qián ma xiōng dei？”
我們常有這樣的困惑，不怎麼熟的人冷不丁的找上你讓你給TA幫點忙，貌似也不主動提報酬，而且你自己手頭事兒也不少，該答應還是不答應呢？
wǒ men cháng yǒu zhè yàng de kùn huò ，bú zěn me shú de rén lěng bú dīng de zhǎo shàng nǐ ràng nǐ gěi TAbāng diǎn máng ，mào sì yě bú zhǔ dòng tí bào chóu ，ér qiě nǐ zì jǐ shǒu tóu shì ér yě bú shǎo ，gāi dá yīng hái shì bú dá yīng ne ？
傳統上，自己力所能及的小事兒，幫一下也就算了，順水人情。不過就怕以後人家壓根兒也不記得。
chuán tǒng shàng ，zì jǐ lì suǒ néng jí de xiǎo shì ér ，bāng yī xià yě jiù suàn le ，shùn shuǐ rén qíng 。bú guò jiù pà yǐ hòu rén jiā yā gēn ér yě bú jì dé 。
最近越來越多的人主張，你提的要求雖然是我能力範圍內的事情，但也是我謀生的本事，辛辛苦苦培養出來的技能要給人免費打工，大概沒有人會樂意。
zuì jìn yuè lái yuè duō de rén zhǔ zhāng ，nǐ tí de yào qiú suī rán shì wǒ néng lì fàn wéi nèi de shì qíng ，dàn yě shì wǒ móu shēng de běn shì ，xīn xīn kǔ kǔ péi yǎng chū lái de jì néng yào gěi rén miǎn fèi dǎ gōng ，dà gài méi yǒu rén huì lè yì 。
reddit網站一名網友就有親身經歷，他說：
redditwǎng zhàn yī míng wǎng yǒu jiù yǒu qīn shēn jīng lì ，tā shuō ：
I had my own gig designing...well, everything: websites, logos, ads, brochures, video, etc. Always got asked to do something for free because it “might lead to something else”.
我的工作是設計……呃……設計很多東西：網站、商標、廣告、小冊子、視頻等等。就老是有人要我免費幫TA幹活兒，不然就會“有別的不好的影響”。
wǒ de gōng zuò shì shè jì ……e ……shè jì hěn duō dōng xī ：wǎng zhàn 、shāng biāo 、guǎng gào 、xiǎo cè zǐ 、shì pín děng děng 。jiù lǎo shì yǒu rén yào wǒ miǎn fèi bāng TAgàn huó ér ，bú rán jiù huì “yǒu bié de bú hǎo de yǐng xiǎng ”。
Did it a few times, nothing came out of it, then when I wanted to charge for something the person was outraged and basically stopped talking to me.
我也幫過幾次，結果沒有任何報酬，然後我就跟人提了收費的事兒，結果人家很生氣，再也沒理過我。
wǒ yě bāng guò jǐ cì ，jié guǒ méi yǒu rèn hé bào chóu ，rán hòu wǒ jiù gēn rén tí le shōu fèi de shì ér ，jié guǒ rén jiā hěn shēng qì ，zài yě méi lǐ guò wǒ 。
他的經歷可能就是你的經歷。有人在底下回復說：
tā de jīng lì kě néng jiù shì nǐ de jīng lì 。yǒu rén zài dǐ xià huí fù shuō ：
If your friend owns a business, don't ask for a friend discount or for some free products, a great friend is one that pays full price to support their friend. Real friends don't take advantage of their hardworking friends trying to make a living. Real friends try to help them out on their journey.
如果你有個朋友是做生意的，你就別叫人家給你打折或者免費了，好朋友就應該付全款支持自己的朋友才對。真朋友是不會從自己朋友謀生的血汗裡面撈好處的。真朋友會一路幫他們。
rú guǒ nǐ yǒu gè péng yǒu shì zuò shēng yì de ，nǐ jiù bié jiào rén jiā gěi nǐ dǎ shé huò zhě miǎn fèi le ，hǎo péng yǒu jiù yīng gāi fù quán kuǎn zhī chí zì jǐ de péng yǒu cái duì 。zhēn péng yǒu shì bú huì cóng zì jǐ péng yǒu móu shēng de xuè hàn lǐ miàn lāo hǎo chù de 。zhēn péng yǒu huì yī lù bāng tā men 。
應付這樣的情況也有妙招，有一名網友就支招說：
yīng fù zhè yàng de qíng kuàng yě yǒu miào zhāo ，yǒu yī míng wǎng yǒu jiù zhī zhāo shuō ：
That has happened to me so many times it stopped bothering me. People think nothing of asking their friend the designer to work for free. I started telling people that their design was going to take me an hour, cutting my grass takes an hour. If they'll come cut my grass I'll spend that hour working on their project.
我以前也碰到過好多次這樣的事兒，現在我已經不受這些事困擾了。有人叫人幫忙設計個啥的時候根本不會想到要給報酬。我後來就開始告訴他們，設計這個要花上我一個小時，我割個草也要一小時。如果你願意過來幫過修剪草坪，我就幫你設計。
wǒ yǐ qián yě pèng dào guò hǎo duō cì zhè yàng de shì ér ，xiàn zài wǒ yǐ jīng bú shòu zhè xiē shì kùn rǎo le 。yǒu rén jiào rén bāng máng shè jì gè shá de shí hòu gēn běn bú huì xiǎng dào yào gěi bào chóu 。wǒ hòu lái jiù kāi shǐ gào sù tā men ，shè jì zhè gè yào huā shàng wǒ yī gè xiǎo shí ，wǒ gē gè cǎo yě yào yī xiǎo shí 。rú guǒ nǐ yuàn yì guò lái bāng guò xiū jiǎn cǎo píng ，wǒ jiù bāng nǐ shè jì 。
NOBODY has ever taken me up on it including the two friends with lawn care businesses. These days I just say no, I'm too backed up with paying work.
後來就再也沒有人叫我免費打工了，甚至包括兩個做割草生意的朋友。現在我就直接拒絕，我十分支持有償勞動。
hòu lái jiù zài yě méi yǒu rén jiào wǒ miǎn fèi dǎ gōng le ，shèn zhì bāo kuò liǎng gè zuò gē cǎo shēng yì de péng yǒu 。xiàn zài wǒ jiù zhí jiē jù jué ，wǒ shí fèn zhī chí yǒu cháng láo dòng 。
有償勞動的確是必要的，畢竟現在的人到手的工資本就不多，北上廣深的話交個房租等於腰斬，都沒錢在啤酒裡泡枸杞了。
yǒu cháng láo dòng de què shì bì yào de ，bì jìng xiàn zài de rén dào shǒu de gōng zī běn jiù bú duō ，běi shàng guǎng shēn de huà jiāo gè fáng zū děng yú yāo zhǎn ，dōu méi qián zài pí jiǔ lǐ pào gǒu qǐ le 。
Reddit網站對於現代社交總結了許多tips，我們彙編了一些，分享給大家。
Redditwǎng zhàn duì yú xiàn dài shè jiāo zǒng jié le xǔ duō tips，wǒ men huì biān le yī xiē ，fèn xiǎng gěi dà jiā 。
If you are the only one trying to maintain a friendship, they aren't your friend and your time and energy would be better spent somewhere else.
如果在一段友情裡，你是那個唯一想要維護友情的人，那他們就不是你的朋友。你也不需要把時間和精力花在這兒。
rú guǒ zài yī duàn yǒu qíng lǐ ，nǐ shì nà gè wéi yī xiǎng yào wéi hù yǒu qíng de rén ，nà tā men jiù bú shì nǐ de péng yǒu 。nǐ yě bú xū yào bǎ shí jiān hé jīng lì huā zài zhè ér 。
If someone is clearly depressed, prefers alone time, or needs your help before something bad happens, this is not the tip for you to follow. Please reach out to that person and let them know you care.
如果你的朋友的確很沮喪，想要一個人靜靜，或者是為了避免更糟糕的情況，急需你的幫助，那就別拋棄他們。一定要伸出援手，讓他們知道你很在乎他們。
rú guǒ nǐ de péng yǒu de què hěn jǔ sàng ，xiǎng yào yī gè rén jìng jìng ，huò zhě shì wéi le bì miǎn gèng zāo gāo de qíng kuàng ，jí xū nǐ de bāng zhù ，nà jiù bié pāo qì tā men 。yī dìng yào shēn chū yuán shǒu ，ràng tā men zhī dào nǐ hěn zài hū tā men 。
But if you have friends who you consistently try to make plans with, they decline or take a rain check with a "oh we'll have to hang out soon" and never get back with you, yet you see them out with other friends all the time, then yes, this is very applicable. You deserve better friends.
不過如果你的朋友是你老是得為TA改變計劃的那種——他們要麼拒絕，要麼說“下次吧”、“改天我們再出去玩兒”，結果後來也沒回音了，但是你卻看到TA有時間天天和別人出去玩兒——那，該怎麼做你很清楚。你值得更好的朋友。
bú guò rú guǒ nǐ de péng yǒu shì nǐ lǎo shì dé wéi TAgǎi biàn jì huá de nà zhǒng ——tā men yào me jù jué ，yào me shuō “xià cì ba ”、“gǎi tiān wǒ men zài chū qù wán ér ”，jié guǒ hòu lái yě méi huí yīn le ，dàn shì nǐ què kàn dào TAyǒu shí jiān tiān tiān hé bié rén chū qù wán ér ——nà ，gāi zěn me zuò nǐ hěn qīng chǔ 。nǐ zhí dé gèng hǎo de péng yǒu 。
If you really want to connect with someone, take them for a long, scenic walk. Not being face to face takes some of the pressure off, and the scenery puts you in the right mood to open up.
如果你很想和某個人加深關係，不妨帶TA們出去散個步，周邊景緻很好可以散很久的那種。免去了面對面的交流可以消除一部分社交壓力，而且優美的風景能讓你們心情好得敞開心扉。
rú guǒ nǐ hěn xiǎng hé mǒu gè rén jiā shēn guān xì ，bú fáng dài TAmen chū qù sàn gè bù ，zhōu biān jǐng zhì hěn hǎo kě yǐ sàn hěn jiǔ de nà zhǒng 。miǎn qù le miàn duì miàn de jiāo liú kě yǐ xiāo chú yī bù fèn shè jiāo yā lì ，ér qiě yōu měi de fēng jǐng néng ràng nǐ men xīn qíng hǎo dé chǎng kāi xīn fēi 。
Don't ask people if they're free on a certain date without specifying why you're asking. Simply asking "are you free on Friday?" comes across like you're tricking the other person into doing whatever it is you want them to do.
先說清楚自己的目的，再問人家某天是否有空。如果只是問“週五你有空嗎”這樣的問題就會給人感覺你在誘使他們去做你自己想讓他們做的事情。
xiān shuō qīng chǔ zì jǐ de mù de ，zài wèn rén jiā mǒu tiān shì fǒu yǒu kōng 。rú guǒ zhī shì wèn “zhōu wǔ nǐ yǒu kōng ma ”zhè yàng de wèn tí jiù huì gěi rén gǎn jiào nǐ zài yòu shǐ tā men qù zuò nǐ zì jǐ xiǎng ràng tā men zuò de shì qíng 。
If you constantly vent your problems to someone, make sure to also call them when things are going well. Good listeners can sometimes get overwhelmed, and it's nice to hear positive news. To add to that, also make sure you're available to let them vent their problems. Relationships are a two way street.
如果你不停地跟某個人訴苦，那最好在事情步入正軌之後給TA們一個信兒。貼心的傾聽者們有時候也會懵，所以最好讓他們收到好消息。另外還有一點就是，你自己也得保證有空聽他們倒苦水。畢竟人際關係是雙向的。
rú guǒ nǐ bú tíng dì gēn mǒu gè rén sù kǔ ，nà zuì hǎo zài shì qíng bù rù zhèng guǐ zhī hòu gěi TAmen yī gè xìn ér 。tiē xīn de qīng tīng zhě men yǒu shí hòu yě huì měng ，suǒ yǐ zuì hǎo ràng tā men shōu dào hǎo xiāo xī 。lìng wài hái yǒu yī diǎn jiù shì ，nǐ zì jǐ yě dé bǎo zhèng yǒu kōng tīng tā men dǎo kǔ shuǐ 。bì jìng rén jì guān xì shì shuāng xiàng de 。
If you have a chore that you actually enjoy, never tell anyone you enjoy it.
如果有一件其實你很喜歡做的雜務，千萬不要告訴任何人！
rú guǒ yǒu yī jiàn qí shí nǐ hěn xǐ huān zuò de zá wù ，qiān wàn bú yào gào sù rèn hé rén ！
You'll do that chore for the rest of your days, even if you stop enjoying it.
要麼你就得做一輩子，哪怕之後你不再喜歡做這件事了……
yào me nǐ jiù dé zuò yī bèi zǐ ，nǎ pà zhī hòu nǐ bú zài xǐ huān zuò zhè jiàn shì le ……
You get no credit for doing that chore, since it’s really not even a chore, right?
要麼再也不會有人因為你做的這件事情表揚你了，畢竟對你來講不算是雜務了，不是嗎？
yào me zài yě bú huì yǒu rén yīn wéi nǐ zuò de zhè jiàn shì qíng biǎo yáng nǐ le ，bì jìng duì nǐ lái jiǎng bú suàn shì zá wù le ，bú shì ma ？
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