大可不必急著給自己找“另一半”，只需細細體味單身的妙處，好好享受當下的生活，在未來某一刻，最好的人自然就會出現。
Ah, singledom. It’s a strange place to be. Of course, when you’re 19, 21 or even 26, there’s nothing better than being all footloose and fancy free1) (as my aunt would put it). You want to be out with your friends every night and you want to be meeting dark, handsome strangers who whisk you off2) for fleeting affairs.... Because when you’re younger, life is all about your mates, building a career, being independent and having “fun.” The thought of settling down and having babies seems so alien. “It’s something you do when you’re old,” a certain teen boyband member recently told me during an interview. “Like when you’re 30.”
啊，單身。這是一種奇怪的狀態。當然，在你19歲、21歲甚至26歲的時候，自由自在、無拘無束(我阿姨會這麼說)是再好不過的事了。你想每晚都跟朋友們出去玩，你想邂逅皮膚黝黑的陌生帥哥，被他捲入一場露水情緣……因為當你還年輕時，生活不外乎是交交朋友、打拼事業、學會獨立和找找“樂子”。安定下來、為人父母的想法似乎是天方夜譚。“這是年紀大了以後你會去做的事，”一個十幾歲的男孩樂隊成員在最近的一次訪談裡跟我說道，“比如在你30歲的時候。”
1. footloose and fancy free：(因為單身而)自由自在，行動無拘無束
2. whisk sb. off：迅速帶走
He had a point (despite his slightly misguided view on what’s “old”). When you’re an excitable teen just out of college or university and dying to make your mark on the world, you have this dreamy idea that when you’ve made your millions, snogged3) loads of fitties4) and bought a house, you will magically find the boy of your dreams and settle down in a whirlwind of rose petals and confetti5). You imagine how it’ll all just come together—and more importantly—you presume that at around 30, you’ll be ready for it.
他說得有道理(儘管在什麼是“年紀大了”的問題上他的觀點稍稍受了點誤導)。當你還是一個剛從學院或大學畢業的熱血青年，渴望著在這世界上打下屬於自己的烙印時，會有這麼一個美夢般的想法：在你腰纏萬貫、吻遍帥哥、買下一幢豪宅後，你就會奇蹟般地找到你的夢中男孩，然後在一場玫瑰花瓣和五彩紙屑漫天飛舞的婚禮中安定下來。你想象著這一切將如何並肩而至——更重要的是，你設想自己在30歲左右的時候就做好迎接這一切的準備了。
3. snog [snɒɡ] vt. 親吻，愛撫
4. fitty [ˈkɪti] n. 英俊、有魅力的男人
5. confetti [kənˈfeti] n. (狂歡、婚禮等時投撒的)五彩紙屑(或紙帶)
But then reality strikes and you find that suddenly you are on that downward slope to 30—and shock, horror—you’re still single (and maybe not even that bothered about marriage and babies). All around you, your pals are celebrating 30th birthdays, engagements and wedding days. Some have even welcomed little babas6) into the world. It’s all very cute and of course you’re unbelievably happy for them. But you’re so far off that world. It can leave you feeling like a bit of a failure. Why haven’t you got that life yet? Why do you not want that life yet?
但後來現實給了你當頭一棒，你發現突然之間，你正走在去往30歲的下坡路上——真讓人震驚、恐懼——而你還是孤家寡人一個(也許都沒為婚姻和孩子這些事煩惱過)。看看周圍，你的朋友們有的在慶祝30歲生日，有的在慶祝訂婚，有的在慶祝結婚紀念日，有的甚至已經迎來了新生命。這一切都好極了，你當然為他們感到開心不已。但你離那個世界卻如此遙遠。這不免給你帶來一絲失敗感。為什麼你還沒擁有那樣的生活？為什麼你還不想要那樣的生活？
6. baba [ˈbɑːbɑː] n. (印度的)孩童，嬰兒
Here’s something that happens far too often. You go to a friend’s wedding. You’re armed with a smile and a beady eye (both perfected for the Best Man and ushers7)). But instead you find yourself on a table with all the coupled off pals. “Who are you with then?” they ask. “Oh I’m here on my own,” you reply, fully aware of the pity tilt of the head that is coming your way8). And sure enough, there it is. “Oh, well maybe you’ll find someone here tonight?” they suggest “helpfully.” “Oh thanks, yeah I never thought of that,” you think to yourself, still smiling of course.
下面要說的事情太經常發生了。你去參加一個朋友的婚禮，帶著一臉微笑和晶亮的眼睛(兩者都為吸引伴郎和引座員被精心修飾過)。然而事與願違，你發現自己坐的那一桌都是有伴的。“你跟誰一起來的？”他們問。“哦，我一個人來的。”你回答說，同時清楚地意識到他們會頭一歪，對你表示同情。果然，說來就來了。“哦，那也許今晚你會在這兒找到你的另一半？”他們“頗有助益”地建議道。“哦，謝謝，是啊，我從沒考慮過這個。”你自忖道，笑容當然還掛在臉上。
7. usher [ˈʌʃə(r)] n. 引座員
8. come one’s way：意外落在……頭上；偶爾發生在……身上
But why does being single in your late twenties, early thirties (and perhaps older than that) seem like such a life failure? What if you’re actually—shock, horror—happy being single at (almost) 30?
但為什麼到了奔三或30出頭(或者更大)的年紀還單身就讓人覺得彷彿是人生重大的失敗呢？如果你確實——真讓人震驚、恐懼——享受(即將)30歲的單身生活，那會怎麼樣呢？
Recently someone told one of my single buddies that if she had found herself still single at 30, she’d be forced to find herself a man who already had kids. Clearly, she thought being single so “late” in life is a call for desperate measures what with9) the old body clock ticking away10) and all that. But come on, being 30 is hardly over the hill is it? And there’s no rush to be having kids. What’s the point in panicking?
最近有人對我的一個單身朋友說，如果她在30歲的時候仍然單身，就得被迫給自己找一個已經拖兒帶女的男人。顯然，她認為這麼“大”的年紀還單身就需要採取極端措施了，因為身體的時鐘在滴答作響以及諸如此類的原因。但是，得了吧，30歲還沒有抵達人生的頂峰不是嗎？而且不用那麼著急要孩子吧。恐慌的意義何在呢？
9. what with：因為，由於；考慮到
10. tick away：使(分、秒等)滴答滴答過去
For me singledom (at my age!) has actually been quite the eye opener11). As a teen (and early 20-something), I was in and out of long-term relationships. To be precise, three long-term relationships. They were great while they lasted but hey, it didn’t work out. And since the last one ended just over 18 months ago, I’ve discovered there’s a whole new side to life when you’re single.
對我而言，單身(哪怕在我這個年紀！)其實使我眼界更為開闊。在我十幾歲(以及20歲出頭)時，我經歷過幾次愛情長跑。準確說來，是三段長期戀情。身在其中的時候感覺都很棒，但是它們都不了了之。18個多月前，我的上一場戀愛結束了。自那以後我發現，當一個人單身的時候，生活會呈現出全新的一面。
11. eye opener：使人打開眼界的經歷；有啟發作用的東西；發人深省的事物
Firstly, I’ve learnt how to properly take care of myself. Gone are the days where I couldn’t fix a leak in the bathroom or change a tyre on the car. When you’re a girl on your own, you learn this stuff. A few hours of your time getting to grips with12) the basics is much preferable to facing plumbing charges or having to wait for the AA13) on a busy London road. You just do it.
首先，我學會了如何照顧好自己。曾經的我面對衛生間的漏水束手無策，也不會換汽車輪胎，不過那些日子已經一去不復返了。當一個女孩孤身一人時，她就會學會做這些事情。比起繳一筆水管維修費用或是不得不在倫敦繁忙的道路上等待AA汽車救援，更為可取的做法還是花上幾個小時自己處理這些基本問題。你只需動手去做就好了。
12. get to grips with：(認真)對付或處理
13. AA：英國汽車協會(Automobile Association)，可提供汽車救援服務。
Secondly, I save at least £30 on my fortnightly shop because I don’t have to buy so much meat! (Why do boys like meat so much? I mean, I like a steak as much as the next person, but do you really need meat in every meal?) The result—more space for wine, cider14), cheese and fruit. Brilliant!
其次，我在兩週一次的購物上省了至少30英鎊，因為我不用再買那麼多肉！(為什麼男生那麼愛吃肉？我是說我跟其他人一樣愛吃牛排，但是真的需要每餐都有肉嗎？)這樣一來，每餐就有了更多選擇：酒，蘋果汁，起司和水果。太棒了！
14. cider [ˈsaɪdə(r)] n. 蘋果汁；蘋果酒
Thirdly, I’ve made some lovely new friends through the simple gift of time. Before, I’d be running home to get the dinner started or spending Saturday lunch times in Ikea15). Now, I can stay in the pub for as long as I like without worrying about starting a row16) and on Saturdays I can grab brunch or watch the footie17) or shop with my friends—sometimes, we even go for a manicure18). In fact, some of my now closest friends are people I’ve got to know in the last year—and I wouldn’t change our hungover sofa sessions for the world.
第三，我結識了一些可愛的新朋友——僅僅是因為我有了更多時間。換作從前，我會要麼忙著跑回家準備晚餐，要麼在宜家打發週六的午餐時光。如今，我在酒吧裡想待多久就待多久，不用擔心這會引發一場爭吵；週六的時候我可以吃一頓早午餐，或者看一場足球賽，或者跟我的朋友們一起去購物，有時候我們甚至會去做一次美甲。實際上，現在我的一些最親密的朋友就是我在去年認識的，而我無論如何都不會改變我們宿醉後的沙發臥談。
15. Ikea：宜家家居，跨國性的居家用品零售企業，1943年創立於瑞典。
16. row [rəʊ] n. 吵鬧，爭吵
17. footie [fʊti] n. 〈英口〉足球運動
18. manicure [ˈmænɪkjʊə(r)] n. 修指甲(包括指甲的修剪、塗染等)
I’ve completely redecorated my flat. If my ex were to walk back in now, he wouldn’t know what had hit him19)—it almost looks like a grown up’s apartment. And that’s all down to my new-found abilities with some paint, a hammer and some nails. It’s a wonder!
我已經徹底地重新裝飾了自己的公寓。如果我的前男友現在走進來，他會驚得目瞪口呆——它現在看起來幾乎就像是一個成年人的寓所。這都要歸功於我新發現的自己駕馭塗料、錘子和釘子的能力。這真是個奇蹟！
19. not know what hit you：因吃驚而不知所措；驚呆了
I’ll happily eat and holiday alone—pretty much rock up20) to any bar in the world and stay there for hours. But that’s okay—in fact, most of the time the owner ends up being my NBF21) before the week is out.
我一個人開心用餐、快樂度假——可以隨意晃進世界上任何一個酒吧，在那兒待上幾個小時。可是那沒關係——實際上在大多數情況下，要不了一週，那個酒吧的老闆就會成為我的新知己。
20. rock up：不約而至，悄然抵達
21. NBF：新知己(new best friend)
I’ve even done the craziest thing ever and left a secure job at a magazine to go freelance. It turns out it was a brilliant decision! But if I was still in a relationship, I would have been far more dubious about taking that financial risk. Having someone else to worry about would have definitely swayed me away from making the leap.
我甚至幹了一件最瘋狂的事兒：放棄了一份在雜誌社的穩定工作，做起了自由職業者。事實證明這是一個棒極了的決定！但如果我當時還處在一段感情當中，我對於要不要冒這個經濟風險則會猶豫得多。如果有其他人需要擔心，我必然不會跨出這麼一大步。
This is not to say being single hasn’t had its moments. Of course there are times when you miss the cuddling up on the sofa to watch a film, or the on-running debate of who should have got voted out of The X Factor22). Even just having someone to spoil rotten is nice.
這並不是說單身就一點不好也沒有。當然，有些時候你會想念兩人一起窩在沙發裡看電影的時光，或者是就“英國偶像”裡誰本該落選而進行的喋喋不休的爭吵。哪怕只是有個人讓你把他寵壞也是好的。
22. The X Factor：《英國偶像》，英國歌唱選秀節目
But all in all, the last 18 months have been the best life lesson I’ve ever had. It’s not that you can’t do all these things when you’re in a couple. It’s just, more often than not, you don’t want to because you’re pretty content with how things are. People even stay in relationships because they feel they should—not because they’re madly in love and really want to. If it’s not right, then why settle? You could find the most amazing person if you’re strong enough to wait.
但是總而言之，過去的18個月是我上過的最好的人生課。並不是說你有伴侶就不能做所有這些事情了，只是更多時候你並不想去做，因為你挺滿足於現狀的。甚至有些人留在一段感情關係中只是因為他們覺得自己應該如此，而不是因為他們瘋狂墜入愛河而想要這樣。如果這不是你想要的感情，那為什麼要安定下來呢？如果你有一顆足夠強大的心去等待，你會找到那個最棒的人。
Being able to dedicate so much time to improving a work situation, to seeing old friends, making loads of new friends, not worrying about time and just seeing the world through my own eyes and not through someone else’s for once, has been the best experience ever for me.
能夠投入很多時間來改善自己的工作狀況、跟老朋友見面、交很多新朋友、不用擔心時間、僅僅通過自己而非別人的眼睛看一次世界——這是我迄今獲得的最好的人生體驗。
And you know what the most exciting part is? That if we want it, we still have that whole “finding someone you adore” thing to come. At some point, we will meet that person we want to spend every waking moment with; that we want to travel with; that we want to snog the face off ... and we have all of that to look forward to.
你知道這其中最激動人心的部分是什麼嗎？那就是如果我們想的話，我們仍然可以期待著“找到自己心儀的那個人”這件事的發生。在某個時刻，我們會遇到那個人，那個我們想與之共度醒著的每一刻的人，想一起去旅行的人，想深深親吻和緊緊相擁的人……所有這一切我們都可以期待。
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